My Final Draft!
Muhammad Farhan Bin Zulkifli
S10032268J
Final Draft
22nd January 2007
Russkaya Mafiya
The winter in Moscow has never been forgiving. Day or night, the temperature is always enough to make the fountains ice up, as if time was frozen still. The colours of St. Basil look like they have been bleached white from the snow. The Cold War was over a long time ago. Nevertheless, with the Dolgoprudnenskaya, vices in the city stay hotter than ever, bustling in every crevice. Drugs, prostitution, illegal firearms, extortion, you name it. None can escape the hands of the leader himself, Alexander Kalashnov. A man known for his intimidating build and his ever-yearning desire for more money than he can own, explaining why the citizens in Moscow fear him. Bloodstains of his past victims mar the allies and streets, reminding them of his sinister presence.
“Nothing but a piece of shit, that’s what he is,” snaps the only man who never fears Kalashnov, Petrik Nankovic. Taking a swig from his usual pint of Koff, he takes out a cigarette and with a quick, loud plink of his lighter, he lights it up and takes a long hard suck before blowing out the smoke into the air.
The bar smells like a million cigarette butts and stale food, a stench no longer unbearable. Nankovic used to be a MBP officer, going undercover for the Bulgarian Secret Service in Moscow but he got fired because he was involved in the vice that he himself was supposed to crack down on. He may sound like a broken man, but Nankovic never gives up. He became a better criminal, with the experience of being an officer for the past 20 years; he now knows their systems inside out. Although he would like to stay out of jail, he wouldn’t mind having Kalashnov behind bars. Obviously drunk, Nankovic slumps over the bar, smelling like a keg of beer. “Pass me that knife Ivan, and put it on his tab,” pointing to an innocent bar-goer. Nankovic, feeling determined, takes the knife under his coat and steps into the harsh cold.
With swift steps, Nankovic walks along the path, completely nonchalant about his surroundings. The bar was a stone’s throw from the red light district in Sektor 13. “Damn those sleazebags,” snaps Nankovic as the prostitutes, kept warm with their faux fur coats; were coming up on him fast like a pack of hyenas when the smell of blood lingers in their nostrils. The clacking from their stilettos gets louder and louder. They were really close. Nankovic starts to frown, still swaggering from the alcohol. “Hello there handsome man,” coos one the women. Nankovic, clearly agitated, whips his knife out. “Look here woman, I not interested in any of your bodies, all I want is Kalashnov.” “Whoa there angry man, we won’t disturb you. But, I know where Kalashnov is,” said the girl with apparent fear in her voice. “Where?” He questions. “Up the street in Sektor 11, that’s where he’s running his business now.” The girl appeared confident, giving him second thoughts about her. He gives her a warming stare and walks away slowly. The girl gives him a meek smile, reminiscent of Nankovic’s wife and her welcoming grin, enraging more anger in him as he recalls the bloody sight which greeted him when he came home.
“So this is it.” Nankovic says, walking towards a dilapidated diner which looks like it has been vacated recently. The walls were tainted with dirt and the smell of urine lingers in the air. He takes a swift turn to his left, then to his right, checking his surroundings. Without hesitation, he kicks the door open and storms in. “Hold on there man.” Everyone in the room cock their AK-47s and points at Nankovic. The room went completely silent, like the dawn rising on St. Petersburg. There stands Alexander Kalashnov, enjoying a glass of whiskey. “It’s alright boys, you all can leave. I and Petrik here have a personal score to settle.” Kalashnov’s men hold their fire, giving Nankovic a piercing stare before stepping outside.
“So what brings you here Petrik?” asks Kalashnov with utmost confidence. “My wife, you killed my damn wife you Russian bastards!” snarls Nankovic in a muffled tone, pointing sharply at him with his forefinger. “Petrik, I am not God, I do not take lives. I am a mere mortal.” Kalashnov shrugs, lifting his shoulders. He stands up with a little huff, and walks towards Nankovic. He comes very close to Nankovic’s face, and let out a quick breath. He shakes his head. “I don’t know what you’re talking about Pet,” Kalashnov raises his brows and starts to smile. The fire in Nankovic’s heart was unbearable. His hatred towards Kalashnov accumulates for all the people that he has murdered, especially his wife. “Liar!” shouts Nankovic in a voice he himself never knew that he is capable of. Kalashnov turns his head abruptly and puts his extended forefinger to his lips. “You wouldn’t want to agitate my honchos eh?” Kalashnov gives Nankovic a smug look. He asks him to come closer to him.
He cautiously approaches him, completely aware of Kalashnov’s every move. He beckons him to come much closer, and points to his ear. Kalashnov then slides both his hands into his coat pockets. Nankovic leans in towards him. Kalashnov, keeping to his voice to a hush, whispers “you know Nankovic, Bulgarian women like your wife… she was very horny.” Nankovic had it. He instantly swings away from Kalashnov’s ear, putting his hand into his trench coat, reaching for his knife. It was too late. Two rampaging bullets fire through Kalashnov’s coat, planting them squarely into Nankovic’s torso. He was armed all along. Nankovic falls, eyes closed, clutching his chest in agony. Kalashnov stands about three feet away from him, shaking his head. “You never learn.” He then heads back to finish his whisky, enjoying every single drop of his victorious reign.
Basking in his victory, Kalashnov laps up the last drop in satisfaction. “I used to be in the MBP, Kalashnov.” He abruptly turns around. A sharp, excruciating pain pierces through his heart. There stands Nankovic, without his trench coat, revealing his MBP emblazoned bullet-proof vest, embedded with the two very bullets from Kalashnov’s pistol. “This is for my wife, you bastard,” Nankovic whispers as he thrusts the knife deeper into Kalashnov, squeezing every ounce of pain in him. Kalashnov, defeated, falls down to the ground with a final thud. His fall alarms his men outside, who rushes in to see him, but it was too late. Without hesitation, their AK-47s start to ring out bullets, penetrating deeper into Nankovic’s vest, finally piercing through his raw flesh. The gunfire was all too much for Nankovic. His vision starts to blacken. He collapses, right beside the very man he had just killed. Kalashnov’s eyes were still open. Nankovic stared intently into his lifeless eyes. “Long live Bulgaria,” says Nankovic, with the last gasp of his breath.
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Well most of the stuff has been updated and i am just left with my dialogue, which is in my thumbdrive and is with naresh who didn’t come for today.
Anyway, are you flying economy or raffles class?
ahh i missing working at the airport. memories, good memories. too bad there’s no pictures. well here is one but it’s not very nice. it’s just a weird flight number at one of the F gates(yes i could go everywhere, inside, even at the apron or inside the plane, the pass works wonders) whereby i heard it’s just going to fly two rounds above the island and then touchdown. hmm.
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Notes on Week 8
Story is Action
• Action is any kind of activity, movement interaction of characters with their surroundings
• Talking about feelings is not as powerful as illustrating why you feel this way through your actions.Film is behavior
Actions are simply the manifestations of behaviour
• Human emotions are understood by watching the actions and reactions of the characters.
I believe that dynamic action also applies to the concept of mimesis, whereby life is imitated by how our actions will be like in real life as well.
Dynamic Action
• Has the potential to enrich the experience of the audience by building an emotional relationship between the characters and the audience
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Hi and welcome to the last and final reflections of this half of the semester. 8 weeks have passed us by and the 9th is just about to conclude after today and then it’s the two week break, Christmas and then Hari Raya Haji. (i know, New year’s eve falls on the same day! amazing huh?)
Oh yes, by the way Ryan, the notes are updated at their following reflection weeks. I copied and pasted my True/False stories onto a page on the top browser but the comments are still at the posts section.
Currently i am at the library using the new and astounding free Wireless@SG which is going to be available for the next 3 years! For the first time we’ll thank the government for giving us such a priviledge. (*consciencePOIT* priviledge!? we have to pay extra 2% GST from next year. this is some compensation for the GST hike, my friend).
So the last week was pretty much a short one. Why? because the usual three hours felt much faster and plus i was eager to end school along with the rest of them because we had to snap pictures for the photography assignment the next day. I didn’t know that the podcast was a pilot project for next year’s batch of FSV students. I really thought it was going to be graded but oh well. It was fun doing it anyway. Different people had totally different scripts. Sean’s one was very traditional and quite short. Marilyn’s one went a little out of point. To me, Mano’s one, although it may sound a little unscripted, was the best because it sounds really authentic.You could feel the intensity of the wife’s shouts and also the awkward silences and the sudden burst of exchanged words, which is typical of usual wife and husband squabbles.
This time we watched another short film called “Terminal Bar”. I thought this was damn interesting because the bar owner took the time and effort to take almost all the pictures of his regular customers every year. It was amazing how the pictures of one person’s gaze stays the same, but his face starts to wrinkle gradually as the years go by. This shows how a picture is extremely useful in sparking a story that can be devised in our heads, much less based on our own experiences.
Seriously i never thought Goldilocks was eaten up in the original Grimms’ Brothers version. Why so sadistic?? They could at least throw Goldilocks away from baby bear’s bed or something.
Maybe we should give it a little twist and make the bears vegan. Now that’s what i call a child-friendly version.
“And they chewed on celery and tomatoes happily ever after”
Has a nice little ring to it doesn’t it? HAHA.
We then had a little charades session that had a situation written on paper, and we had to act it out without using any form of dialogue or whatsoever to describe the actions. My group, along with Jordan and Gek Peng, had to act out a scene where a woman is pregnant but she doesn’t know who the father is. It was a little weak i guess, we did it using our lips the most showing some kind of speech. Jue yi’s one was really amusing because we had a little mash up over the sexuality of the waiter, who we thought was gay. The best was sean’s, who acted out a scene that is very common which is about a girl discovering that her boyfriend’s cheating on her when they both end up in the same restaurant. Hahaha, whatever we did in class was resemblant to this show, Whose Line is It Anyway. I believe you should find this very familiar because it comes from America and Drew Carey’s in it. Hahaha, here’s a little video of a good one.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sql7tCwj9PI
I really don’t know how to link it as an embedded one.tsk
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Week 7 notes.
Dialogue is to:
- Portray (express) emotion
- Express thought
- Build a connection with audience
- Define character
- Communicate to other characters(indicates relationship)
- Communicates message
- Moves plot forward
Dialogue reveals character
- A character talks about himself or herself
- Other people talk about that character
Dialogue establishes relationships between characters
-characters expresses their attitudes and opinions that are in opposition to one another.
Good effective dialogue will move story forward.
Dialogue communicates faces and information to the audience.
- it conveys essential exposition
-Characters will talk about what happened, establishing the story line.
Dialogue should tie your script together.
COMMON MISTAKES
-Dialogue should be used sparingly, never telling the audience what they can see for itself.
-Dialogue is no substitute for action
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Before i write anything in connection to my week 7 reflections. I would like to express my discontent to singapore’s proclaimed biggest blogger, X**x**
all i would like to say is,
get a GRIP on reality man. you are getting way too airheaded for your own good.
if i could get offensive i would, but let’s practice some self-control here shall we?
anyway
here’s the link to the podcast from Multiply. I hope it works at the first shot:
http://artisticvandalism.multiply.com/music/item/1
So to my reflections. Week 7. So cepat.
We had a TEST finally for this module. It was fairly easy i must say because most of the questions were clear cut and awarded fair marks for their respective technical difficulty. The only thing i didn’t get was the very vast amount of space between one question and the other because vast spaces always give me the heebie-jeebies. Why? because it indirectly means that, you’d have to write an answer which is almost equivalent in length to that of an essay, the ironic thing is you’re only awarded a mark or two. Trust me, i don’t go well with essay questions but that doesn’t mean that i’ll go into a fit when i encounter one. I just don’t hate it neither do i like it very much.
In case you were wondering about the podcast, we had to come up with a dialogue, which i think is the whole point of this course, between a husband and wife caught in a sticky little situation of not coming back home on time. I must say i liked ben’s when i heard them record it. The sandbag did wonders.
SO we talked about dialogue for the week. I must agree, without the characters and the dialogue, the show would be nothing but just charlie chaplin falling down into a pit without a single sound, funny. The dialogue itself should also be emotionalized (is there such a word?) by its character in order to incite the same feeling of the character’s emotion to its audience. Now that is what you call good acting but i guess dialogue can only be used to a certain extent when it comes to shows where actions speak louder than words.
We watched two short films, In transit and Autograph book.
Comparing the both of them coming from two different continents, i am extremely impressed by our competition down under in the OZ. In Transit was some amazingly well made stuff. The effects were stunning but the story was a little vague. It was lacking in dialogue but somehow we could see what the character was trying to potray.
In a more local perspective, Autograph book was about a very innocent yet childish argument between two friends and their autograph books. It was through their dialogues that the story begins to unravel. Despite its simplicity, it did invoke a feeling in us to whoever that was talking in the short film.
This shows the contrast i was talking about, you don’t need dialogue all the time, but most of the time you do.
Of course you don’t need a dialogue when you’re strapped to a loose five point parachute harness and you’re 10,000 feet above sea level. The only dialogue you need is a silent prayer along with the swearing and hoping that your reserve parachute will work.
But hey if Hollywood can replicate a whole Middle Earth in their studios and New Zealand, nothing’s impossible.
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I’m listening to Portishead’s Roads at 1.17 am in the morning and it is giving me a very depressing mood.
hai. See you tomorrow everyone.
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Ahh, week 6. It’s amazing how this semester is going much faster than last semester. Maybe it’s the workload. Maybe it’s me slacking too much.
Or maybe D-Day is nearing. *creepymusic*
AH wait. The toilet is beckoning.
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Ok back. So yes. What did we have to do for week 6? Oh yes. Letter to the Past. This was an interesting lesson because things got onto a more personal level with everyone. We were supposed to write to someone who we no longer talk to, or, someone who was close but have passed away. We were broken into groups of course but T1B2 being a male-dominant class, i guess i was quite fine with whoever i was with. I was in a group with Marilyn, Mano and Naresh and i must say, i’m not much of a good storyteller unless the story’s interesting. It was quite hard reading such a personal letter out loud to everyone, but it feels nice when people are paying attention to what you are reading, and from the expressions of their faces, felt the same way that you did. It was the slight moment of silence after listening to each other’s stories that struck thoughts in me. What is personal to us? must it always be a sad and real story? Sure we may be talking about the past but must our past really be that sad? I’m sure that there were happy stories. I think i’m more adapted to writing happily, as you can see from how i’m writing now, than writing sad stuff. However, maybe my expressions of emotions through words are much better when i’m sad. It was very interesting of Naresh to write to his ownself 7 years into the past. It reminded me of that UPS advert where the guy gave the baby a little teddy bear and the guy turns out to be the baby 40 years after.
After our story sharing, Ryan decided to be fair to read us a letter composed by him to his father, whom he didn’t talk to anymore. I felt a little shaken after the story, it was not touching, it sounded almost vengeful but in a subtle kind of way. I could hear the change in your voice after the story and i was certain, you were a little shaken too. It is very strong of you to be able to share the story three times to three different classes, it must have been quite a bummer to see all your students’ depressed looks every time you put the paper down from your face.
After you left the class for a little break, things got a little heated up and I have to admit I have never seen such a heated argument similar to that in more than 2 years. It was quite amazing but now all is in good time.
I like the point that you brought up during the mini-lecture and that hit a nail in my head. It was the fact that the audience wants a sense of escape, to be transported by a screenplay. It makes think about the whole point of film. Why do we indulge in movie making despite the exorbitant amount of money that is used? It is all about the experience and emotions that we want to bring to the audience. It can be extremely depressing or it can be elevating or even, rejuvenating. It’s amazing to be a filmmaker and seeing how your audience react to your masterpiece.
I guess that’s all for week 6. Till tomorrow then. Oh yes my true/false stories are under my posts in case you were finding them.
the notes.
when writing for the audience.
• Our screenwriter is also our storyteller
o The cinematic experience is not just made up of words you might put on paper, but the audiences’ emotional reaction to that information.
Storytelling is not:
- Director to people
- Writer to people
- Camera to people
it is actually about People to People
To connect is the most important point from people to people (trying to connect, information, emotion, experience):
- Themselves
- Their unique vision
- Material
- Drama
and Others…
Audiences want to be transported by a screenplay.
Where do you look for a story? It’s already inside ourselves in the first place. Everything to learn about other people is already in us. But, the only mystery is how to figure out how to connect to it.Experience:
• All people have fragments of stories.
• These potential ideas prompt your desire to know more.
• Respond emotionally and intellectually to what you heard.
• Good stories are born in the heart, not the head.
• Remember the role of an audience. (Audience feel, empathise, understand and etc.)
• After all, you ARE the audienceReview
3 storytelling tools
• Observation
• Memory
• Experience
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True/False Stories
So it just happened to me that I was waiting at the bus interchange waiting for my friend. I spotted a blind man wandering aimlessly here and there. Me , being the good Samaritan that I am, decided to come over to him and ask him where he was going. So I did, he mentioned that he wanted to go sit at somewhere where there was air conditioning. There was a shopping centre nearby and I took him by hand, walking slowly to lead him there. His white stick hit a few passer-bys but I guess they didn’t mind. I don’t know what the blind man was muttering in Chinese under his breath, it was as if he was swearing. So we reached the shopping centre and he didn’t seem to be very happy with me. So I told him that I brought him to an air-conditioned place to sit down. He scolded me for making him walk so far when all he really wanted was some cash from me. Now that’s what you call taking advantage of disability.
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As I was wandering around alone in town after school one day, I was approached by two foreigners whom I believe were Dutch, asking for directions to go to the Esplanade. Their accent was extremely thick, I almost couldn’t differentiate whether he was bellowing at me or talking to me nicely. I tried to use my hands to tell him what bus number to take to the Esplanade but he mimicked me instead. In desperation, I just said out the number of the bus out in Malay and as amazing as it sounds, they understood me loud and clear. They then explained to me that their descendants were a part of the Dutch community in Malacca and the language was then passed on to them. I bid them farewell and they also said thank you, both of which was in Malay as well. It sure proved to me that you can still be understood, even when you least expect.
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Character
A story starts with character. The heart(feel), the soul( and the nervous system of the story.
It is through your characters that viewers experience emotions
- Without character, you have no actions.
- Without action you have no conflict
- Without conflict, you have no story
- Without story, you have no screenplay (MACAM STAR WARS!)
- Who is my character
- What does he want
- What is her quest
- What drives him to the resolution of the story
You must create your characters in relationship to other people or things
- They experience conflict in achieving their dramatic need
- They interact with other characters
- They interact with their emotions
Memory
Your memory is a wonderful cabinet of past incidents which you have experienced or been told
These memories are points of references
WRITE WHAT YOU KNOW. haha. I don’t know anything right now.
Reflections.
I think i’d like to start all my reflections with the lyrics of a earworm. Is that okay?
My independence is calling my name
A doubtful force divides my faith
My independence only hesitates
An unsured choice I can’t embrace
You gonna have to carve me,
Carve me from stone,
Right to the bone or I’ll end up alone
Playing the role
Of someone in control
Why do I rush to slow down?
Why do I rush to slow down everything?
Why do I rush to slow down?
Why do I rush to slow down everything?
Will the dice ever roll?
Will l ever know?
Will the plot ever twist,
Or will I still resist?
I’m playing the part of a lost realist
That’s some good stuff from Trapt. I would want to say the four letter word that begins with ‘S’ but i guess that’ll be inappropriate unless Ryan gives us a freedom of speech. I hope. In vain probably.
Anyway. To lesson five!
So after coming to class with 2 people watch assignments, i should have known that we were going to get these two very different individuals into a situation. Well actually i didn’t know, i just thought that people watch was just supposed to be fun. Besides the point, last week we were also told to come up with imaginary names and addresses for these two nutcases that i have. Anyway, i tried my best (maybe? but i think i screwed up a little bit on the selection of the observed, both of them seemed a little hard to couple up) My story is “the MRT seat”. It’s somewhere in the posts. If you don’t really like it you can tell me but of course it is your job to do so, insconspicuously. HAHA. i’m just joking.
So after the stories, we learnt about what is written above in the ‘notes’ and we had to watch one clip from the film ‘Taxi Driver’ which stars Robert De Niro. I must say i prefer Robert as a much older actor, such as Meet the Parents rather than old ones like Taxi Driver and Cape Fear (SHIVER. Intro to film just had to make me watch it. Damn the lots which i took)
We had to analyse his character in a three dimensional way. I must say it was a pretty good exercise to analyse the character in depth using the facts we already can see even though we’re like 5 minutes into the movie.
Next clip was a short movie call Les Mistons (The brats) by Francois Truffaut. It was an amusing one, i loved the part where the boy smelt the girl’s bicycle seat because he was in ‘love’ with her. We also had to analyse more on character and i think that Francois Truffaut was actually one of the boys as he could narrate the story using his voice over in such great detail.
We have a new assignment that is letter to the past. Frankly i do not have the slightest idea on who i want to write to. We also need a password with this one.
Hmmmm. I need a Pepsi. Like right now.
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Anyway, let’s get back to normal and more comprehensible text shall we? Ah yes. Lesson 4. One word.
Election. What’s that? No it’s not Lee Hsien Loong pulverising the opposition. It’s a movie.
I know what you’re all thinking. “WHAT. you watch a movie for class??”
Well it seems like it, but the analysis that we have to do for the movie would be so extensive that you would rather pay 8 dollars for a ticket to watch one and then walk out of the theatre with popcorn stuck on your crotch. While we watch it for free and then toil and burn midnight oil for a few nights to report and present it. I hope a certain lecturer doesn’t get offended. It’s nice i must admit. Let’s all take a joke lightly shall we?
Luckily Ryan’s a banging lecturer and she said that we’ll only watch it as a perfect example of Aristotle’s perfect idea of a GREEK (I like the word to be said aloud. I’m weird) tragedy.
Election stars Matthew Broaderick ( I love him in Godzilla) acts as a compassionate teacher, Jim McAllister and he will be our guy who suffers the ‘greek tragedy’. REEEEEEESE( Now you see a connection between me and double ’E’s) Witherspoon is playing as Tracy Flick, an overambitious student, if not kept in check with reality, might just take over the world. Living the so-called American Dream and being fairly sucessful, Jim is quite intimidated by the presence of Tracy Flick, who is a running candidate for the Student Council presidential election. Her past with Jim’s best friend, was a very sexual one, but Tracy escaped without a scratch while his best friend, lost everything in life. Seeking revenge, Jim psyches a well-liked jock, Paul Metzler (you Betzler) to run for the election as well.
Tracy, appalled by the decision, decides to pull off the most well fought campaign ever. She claims that Paul is being spoonfed while she is working her ass off to win.
However, drifting away from the main plot, Paul has an adopted sister named Tammy. She’s basically a “girl. interrupted” who searches in vain for her sexuality. As a lesbian, she makes out with her best friend, who is actually straight. The best friend then gives Paul a blowjob to spite her and the next day they were a couple. Tammy, also appalled, now makes a decision to run for President as well for revenge.
We’ve seen enough revenge. What a negative word.
Jim McAllister’s obsession to ignite Tracy Flick’s downfall led to his own. He has always had issues with himself, even porn. His brief scandal with his best friend’s wife led to his divorce with his wife which leaves him only with his pathetic car. His decision to tamper with the election results to enable Paul to win, left him without a job. He was almost society scum until he decides to move to NYC where he tried to kickstart himself again and is doing so bit by bit.
Jim suffers his own misfortunes out of his own doings and intentions. A true example of a grEEk tragedy. He did the things which he knew that he shouldn’t have, without considering the aftermath. Jim was a good man, but his vengeful inner persona got the better of him.
P.S- It was an R21 movie in Singapore with all the sex scenes and stuff. While i didn’t find it too bothering, it was bloody amusing to watch Marilyn when they started moaning in pleasure in the movie. I think she was going to scratch her neck until the skin peels off. HAHAHAHA. No offence. I’m just high.
Maybe i’ll put her under People Watch 4.
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